So many marriages, families, and friends are ruined or even destroyed when there is an Alcohol Addicted person involved. I can relate, do to the fact, that I was one that basically contributed to almost ruining everything I had, including my life.
It took me some time until I finally realized that something is going to blow up real soon. Whether it would be myself or my family or friends. I saw it coming over the years but, I didn't pay much attention to it.
Spouses, families, and friends tend be afraid of saying the wrong thing at the wrong time to the addict. They have to basically walk on egg shells while around the addict due to the fact they are worried that the addict might just blow up or even get violent in some cases. This is certainly not a way to live for the innocent ones involved.
Also, lets say that your spouse wanted to take a nice ride out in the country or down the shore for example, but, we the addict have already started our day on the drinking binge. So, we are about worthless to them and we now have spoiled their day and evening. Not very fair is it?
Either one way or another it is hard Living With An Alcoholic. My wife can testify to that, as I'm sure many spouses and families of an Alcoholic can say the same.
The alcoholic does not realize what they are doing, not only to themselves, but all of their loved ones that want them to get help. I know, because when I was into the drinking thing, I thought nothing about it and basically did not care about anyone elses thoughts either. But, I must say deep down inside of me, I really did care, but the alcohol demons in me decided to think for me, and control my thoughts, while being under their influence.
When I decided to become Sober, one of the first things that convinced me was, "do I want those rotten Demons inside me to control and love me, or, do I want my loving wife, family and friends to love and care for me?" Well, we all know what the best choice is. Those so called demons I call them only care about one thing, and that is to destroy you and everything around you.
If you really want to change your life for the better, then start by looking at what you are doing to the people that you care and love so much, and just take a good look at where your life is headed if you keep up with your addiction. These couple of things might help you to make that decision to find Sobriety in your life. It certainly did for me.
Always remember that without family and freinds on our side, we will be very lonely drunks in our future. As time goes by the people that loved us will start to stray further and further away. And we will only have one thing left, which is our Addiction.
Start by always thinking Positive in everything you do, and with family and friends on your side you will have a head start to your new Sober life.. Go for it, you will never be sorry you did!
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Sobriety-How Your Life Can Change With One Single Step
Living with a Alcohol Addiction is a serious problem. Some of us can occassionaly have a drink or so at a party or some sort of function without any problem. We can have our fun for the day and leave the bottle alone for some time. Then there are some people that once they start drinking they can't stop until the party is over or they run out of their supply.
I know, because I was one of the people that could not stop. I didn't think anything of it, I was just having fun like everyone else, so I thought. I was getting more wasted on each drink but, I thought I was fine. People would say, haven't you had enough? I laughed and said yeah, right.
The more they harped on it the more I wanted to drink. This went on for years with no end in site. I got to the point in my life that I didn't even want to go anywhere unless there was alcohol at the function. If not, I would bring my own and keep it in the car.
I was embarrassed about my addiction but did not have the courage or the willpower to call it quits. I knew I was doing wrong and that I was destroying myself, and my family too. But, when thinking about that, it still wasn't enough to surrender to my addiction.
As I got older and wiser I made a point and a promise that I would NEVER drink and drive, and I stuck to it. Just becuase I was ruining my life I certainly didn't want to ruin a perfect strangers life and their famlies due to an accident caused by me.
I sat down one day, and started to think of what my life will be in the future continued living the life I led. I added up some of the pros and cons, and believe me the pros out weighed the cons by far. So, the math doesn't lie, I had to start thinking of what I was going to do next.
First, I had to prepare myself, and start a game plan on this huge change in my life I was about to start. All my life I aways had big Dreams of what I wanted out of the short life we all live. But, with the life I lead now it would never happen because I had other things on my mind, like the Alcohol. That always seemed to come first and when I really thought about it, sometimes before my own family and friends. I said that this is really sad that I would even think this way.
I'm a sick minded person I said to myself. But that will change real soon. I knew I couldn't just slow down like some say to do. I wasn't that type of person. I would have to just go Cold Turkey and live with the consequences, I was worried about the DT's and how I would feel after giving up the drink.
I thought, I accuired this addiction on my own because of no self dicipline, no strength or willpower, so now I have to stand up to my wrong doing and fight the demons within me.
This will happen with one Single Step. It is the step to Sobriety. You have to take that first step in order to keep walking away from your addiction. As they say "Baby Steps". It will all fall into place if you just have the willpower and keep a Positive Attitude that you can and will conquer this addiction.
It will be a lot harder to give up the drink than it was to start the drink. Once you have made your mind up, and you have admitted to your addiction, and also realize and accept that you will never be able to pick up a drink again, is when your recovery will start. Your lives will begin to take shape again, and you will have the feeling of accomplishment and pride that you beat your addiction.
To me, it has been wonderful! Everyday and everything seems so clear now, and the only thing I wished I could change is that I should of done this years ago. But, it's never too late to make your change. With all your hard work, dicipline, and willingness to start a fresh life, you will get to where you want, and that is Sobriety.
Take that Single Step, and keep heading for that light ahead of you, and with your determination you will catch up to the light and will see a new and brighter life that has been waiting for your arrival.
God Bless To All!
I know, because I was one of the people that could not stop. I didn't think anything of it, I was just having fun like everyone else, so I thought. I was getting more wasted on each drink but, I thought I was fine. People would say, haven't you had enough? I laughed and said yeah, right.
The more they harped on it the more I wanted to drink. This went on for years with no end in site. I got to the point in my life that I didn't even want to go anywhere unless there was alcohol at the function. If not, I would bring my own and keep it in the car.
I was embarrassed about my addiction but did not have the courage or the willpower to call it quits. I knew I was doing wrong and that I was destroying myself, and my family too. But, when thinking about that, it still wasn't enough to surrender to my addiction.
As I got older and wiser I made a point and a promise that I would NEVER drink and drive, and I stuck to it. Just becuase I was ruining my life I certainly didn't want to ruin a perfect strangers life and their famlies due to an accident caused by me.
I sat down one day, and started to think of what my life will be in the future continued living the life I led. I added up some of the pros and cons, and believe me the pros out weighed the cons by far. So, the math doesn't lie, I had to start thinking of what I was going to do next.
First, I had to prepare myself, and start a game plan on this huge change in my life I was about to start. All my life I aways had big Dreams of what I wanted out of the short life we all live. But, with the life I lead now it would never happen because I had other things on my mind, like the Alcohol. That always seemed to come first and when I really thought about it, sometimes before my own family and friends. I said that this is really sad that I would even think this way.
I'm a sick minded person I said to myself. But that will change real soon. I knew I couldn't just slow down like some say to do. I wasn't that type of person. I would have to just go Cold Turkey and live with the consequences, I was worried about the DT's and how I would feel after giving up the drink.
I thought, I accuired this addiction on my own because of no self dicipline, no strength or willpower, so now I have to stand up to my wrong doing and fight the demons within me.
This will happen with one Single Step. It is the step to Sobriety. You have to take that first step in order to keep walking away from your addiction. As they say "Baby Steps". It will all fall into place if you just have the willpower and keep a Positive Attitude that you can and will conquer this addiction.
It will be a lot harder to give up the drink than it was to start the drink. Once you have made your mind up, and you have admitted to your addiction, and also realize and accept that you will never be able to pick up a drink again, is when your recovery will start. Your lives will begin to take shape again, and you will have the feeling of accomplishment and pride that you beat your addiction.
To me, it has been wonderful! Everyday and everything seems so clear now, and the only thing I wished I could change is that I should of done this years ago. But, it's never too late to make your change. With all your hard work, dicipline, and willingness to start a fresh life, you will get to where you want, and that is Sobriety.
Take that Single Step, and keep heading for that light ahead of you, and with your determination you will catch up to the light and will see a new and brighter life that has been waiting for your arrival.
God Bless To All!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Keeping A Positive Attitude Towards Your Journey To Sobriety
Well, It has been 92 days, Clean and Sober. It really feels great to me. I never thought in a million years I would be on this journey to Sobriety, only because it was a everyday routine for me, just like waking up and brushing your teeth. It was part and my day, and a big part of my life. Everything I did had to revolve around drinking. It has been a long time coming.
I have finally admitted to myself that I have a "Alcohol Addiction" that has to be dealt with in a careful manner. First I must be ready to give up the demons on my own, and I am sure ready for that now. I had to prepare myself for the fight of my life. I didn't want to do the "slow down a little at a time routine", like some people do. I knew that I was not that kind of a person that can have one or two drinks and call it the night. No, my body keep asking for more, and I fed it, till I had enough. The only way to accomplish this addiction for me is to go Cold Turkey, which is what I did. I was worried about the side effects, that people would say might happen. With the help of God, nothing at all happened to me. So, I proved that their theory was wrong about slowing down a little at a time, at least for me, Cold Turkey worked. You have to grab the devil by the horns and put up a good fight, until you win for good. They will try and try to get back into your life. You have to be strong, and push them away no matter how hard it is. Don't ever tilt the bottle up again, because if you do, you will be right back where you started and maybe worse than before.
During the first week I did have the desire for a drink, but keep saying to myself, don't let the demon's win. My mind keep telling me, you are much stronger then the addiction you are fighting, and do not give in. After the first week went by I said, man that was a fast week, then I started counting the days with not a drink. It is like a game I play now, to keep adding the days and rewarding myself for what I have accomplished in a short time.
One day, I thought to myself , I haven't thought about a drink at all today. It was like I never drank, it simply just disappeared out of my body and mind. I felt as if the world was lifted off my shoulders, or I just got released from jail. It was a kinda empty feeling, just like if you were to loss a family member to death. Although, it was a good empty feeling that I had. I felt Free At Last, now I can do anything I want. Before, after I started drinking for the day or evening, I was then a prisoner in my own home, I say that because, I never would drink and drive, so if I needed something after drinking I would have to ask someone to get it for me. That did not go very well in my household.
Now, I am free to come and go as I please, with not a worry in the world, all because, I had a
Positive Attitude from the very beginning of my journey to Sobriety.
Mark
I have finally admitted to myself that I have a "Alcohol Addiction" that has to be dealt with in a careful manner. First I must be ready to give up the demons on my own, and I am sure ready for that now. I had to prepare myself for the fight of my life. I didn't want to do the "slow down a little at a time routine", like some people do. I knew that I was not that kind of a person that can have one or two drinks and call it the night. No, my body keep asking for more, and I fed it, till I had enough. The only way to accomplish this addiction for me is to go Cold Turkey, which is what I did. I was worried about the side effects, that people would say might happen. With the help of God, nothing at all happened to me. So, I proved that their theory was wrong about slowing down a little at a time, at least for me, Cold Turkey worked. You have to grab the devil by the horns and put up a good fight, until you win for good. They will try and try to get back into your life. You have to be strong, and push them away no matter how hard it is. Don't ever tilt the bottle up again, because if you do, you will be right back where you started and maybe worse than before.
One day, I thought to myself , I haven't thought about a drink at all today. It was like I never drank, it simply just disappeared out of my body and mind. I felt as if the world was lifted off my shoulders, or I just got released from jail. It was a kinda empty feeling, just like if you were to loss a family member to death. Although, it was a good empty feeling that I had. I felt Free At Last, now I can do anything I want. Before, after I started drinking for the day or evening, I was then a prisoner in my own home, I say that because, I never would drink and drive, so if I needed something after drinking I would have to ask someone to get it for me. That did not go very well in my household.
Now, I am free to come and go as I please, with not a worry in the world, all because, I had a
Positive Attitude from the very beginning of my journey to Sobriety.
Mark
Sunday, January 24, 2010
How To Go Sober With Mind Over Matter
Three months ago, I faced the biggest challenge of my life, "To Go Sober". I made my mind up, that I have had enough of the alcohol abuse, and the pain that I caused to myself and family.This was a huge decision I had to make, and I had better make it quick before everything totally falls to pieces.
My first thought was that I have to get a game plan, on how I was going to tackle this long journey to sobriety. With a lot of thinking ,things started to come to me quite easy, do to the fact that I started with a "positive attitude" and I truly wanted to be sober this time, because the last time I tried, I did not do to well and fell off the wagon for one reason or another. I really didn't have my whole heart into it the first time. I was young and just wanted to party with my friends. As years went by, and I got older, I started to see how alcohol was affecting me and my life. It was a big wake up call, all I had to do is to look in the mirror and it said it all. No one had to say anything to me, it said it all right in the mirror. As we all know, mirrors and pictures don't lie.
This was the start for me to first change what I saw in the mirror and to change my life and my addicting habits.I said, I"m going to try this on my own and just bite the bullet and go Cold Turkey. I knew that it may cause some complication, but I prayed a lot for this not to happen, and believe it or not, I didn't have one problem at all. God gave me the will power and the strength to get through that hurdle. I truly believe that anyone can conquer anything if you just put your mind to it and keep a "positive attitude" in what you are trying to do. You have to be Strong and Want It Bad , and it will happen for you.
The first two or three days I had thoughts of the drink, but I prepared my mind for this situation in the beginning, because I knew it was going to be hard in the very beginning for me. We are all stronger than we think, as far as the mind goes. We can add habits into our brain, some good, and then, those bad habits. But if we can add them into our brain then we can also erase them just as fast, if you have the will power and the strength to not let the demons take over your body and mind again. God gave us a great gift, the Gift of Life, and I am going to enjoy that gift. It's never to late to change, I did, and I'm loving every minute of it.
It makes you feel good when you know that you have complete control of your body and mind, and to know that no nasty habit can control you any more. I just keep thinking positive and think of all the dreams I have, that I could not accomplish while being controlled by the addiction I had.
Think of what you really want in life, and if you stand strong to yourself you can achieve what ever you want.
I know, I"m on my way to the Dreams I once had, and hopefully be able to help someone that's trying to Go Sober like I did. You will never be sorry you did!
Celebrate... "The Clean Life" that is waiting for you!
The trick to this is very simple, Prepare Your Mind, and Go Sober With Mind Over Matter.
Mark
My first thought was that I have to get a game plan, on how I was going to tackle this long journey to sobriety. With a lot of thinking ,things started to come to me quite easy, do to the fact that I started with a "positive attitude" and I truly wanted to be sober this time, because the last time I tried, I did not do to well and fell off the wagon for one reason or another. I really didn't have my whole heart into it the first time. I was young and just wanted to party with my friends. As years went by, and I got older, I started to see how alcohol was affecting me and my life. It was a big wake up call, all I had to do is to look in the mirror and it said it all. No one had to say anything to me, it said it all right in the mirror. As we all know, mirrors and pictures don't lie.
This was the start for me to first change what I saw in the mirror and to change my life and my addicting habits.I said, I"m going to try this on my own and just bite the bullet and go Cold Turkey. I knew that it may cause some complication, but I prayed a lot for this not to happen, and believe it or not, I didn't have one problem at all. God gave me the will power and the strength to get through that hurdle. I truly believe that anyone can conquer anything if you just put your mind to it and keep a "positive attitude" in what you are trying to do. You have to be Strong and Want It Bad , and it will happen for you.
The first two or three days I had thoughts of the drink, but I prepared my mind for this situation in the beginning, because I knew it was going to be hard in the very beginning for me. We are all stronger than we think, as far as the mind goes. We can add habits into our brain, some good, and then, those bad habits. But if we can add them into our brain then we can also erase them just as fast, if you have the will power and the strength to not let the demons take over your body and mind again. God gave us a great gift, the Gift of Life, and I am going to enjoy that gift. It's never to late to change, I did, and I'm loving every minute of it.
It makes you feel good when you know that you have complete control of your body and mind, and to know that no nasty habit can control you any more. I just keep thinking positive and think of all the dreams I have, that I could not accomplish while being controlled by the addiction I had.
Think of what you really want in life, and if you stand strong to yourself you can achieve what ever you want.
I know, I"m on my way to the Dreams I once had, and hopefully be able to help someone that's trying to Go Sober like I did. You will never be sorry you did!
Celebrate... "The Clean Life" that is waiting for you!
The trick to this is very simple, Prepare Your Mind, and Go Sober With Mind Over Matter.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
How I Did Self Hypnosis To Quit Drinking
I am not a Doctor, nor a therapist by any means, although what I have accomplished over the last three month is remarkable. I used to drink every day, beer only not the hard stuff for many years. I have written other posts regarding some on my stories and what I did to conquer those nasty demons that were controlling my body and my mind.
When I first decided to go cold turkey with the alcohol, I thought to myself this is going to be a long journey ahead of me. I first started by telling myself, what are the pros and cons to my addiction. I really did not have to think to long because.it seemed that all the bad things were out weighing the good right away. I was miserable, not happy, kinda hated myself in a way because I knew I was doing something to harm myself and also my family and friends, but when the drinking started I forgot about those things. I was indeed in denial.
I had to some how get my head together when being sober, to plan my escape from the demons. I said this can only be mind over matter, I can conquer this with no problem. When I said that to myself it was hard,
because I figured it might be a problem. I was affraid of the side affects that might go along with the cold turkey. I keep so busy with my mind and body that it was hard for the urge to kick in. I also ate dinner right after work instead of 10 or 11 at night after my drinking was done. Eating made me so full that I did not even want to drink the beer and blow me up even more. So I was full with some good food instead of alcohol.
Then when getting ready for work I would look in the mirror and what I saw was horrible. I was always skinny but I looked, as you would say, pregnant. I knew by giving up the alcohol that the stomach would go down quick, and it did. I had to say to myself that if I can only get the first day under my belt it will be a challenge to get to the second , third and so on. It was like a game to me, saying who will win? So as the days went by and the stomach going down it gave me more willpower to keep it up. I felt great about myself and what I saw was looking better and better as the days went on. I thought, man this positive attitude I started with is really working. Every day that went by it seems to have been easier and easier to cope this huge change in my life. You really have to want to stop the drinking, and no matter who tells you to quit it isn't going to work unless you really what to change your life on your own..I know because I was told a thousand times, but I was not ready for the change. As you know, the saying sometimes is, you just about have to hit rock bottom for the lights to turn on. They sure did for me and I so happy they did. I still have alcohol in the house and it will stay there, and I will still go to parties and functions and just have my coffee and water. I want to keep showing the demons that I am far better and smarter then they will ever be.
The demons can chase me all they want, but their not going to catch me nor get back into my body ever again. When I say, this is like a game, what I mean is, every one in the world whats to win always and never lose anything. So, when I said How I Did Self Hypnosis to Quit Drinking, it was some of the things I mentioned starting with a positive attitude that you can and will conquer the addiction that has taken over your body. Believe me to win that war with the demons and to start a new and Clean Life is more rewarding than you can ever know.
I am so thankful to God that I had no side affects at all, something that I was worried about the most, and why, I think that the positive attitude had a lot to do with it from the start. Your brain is a great thing and with a clear mind you can control whats happening inside. It stores habits, but you can erase those habits with your mind, just think positive and it will happen, it did for me.
My future... "DESTINY LIFE"
Mark
When I first decided to go cold turkey with the alcohol, I thought to myself this is going to be a long journey ahead of me. I first started by telling myself, what are the pros and cons to my addiction. I really did not have to think to long because.it seemed that all the bad things were out weighing the good right away. I was miserable, not happy, kinda hated myself in a way because I knew I was doing something to harm myself and also my family and friends, but when the drinking started I forgot about those things. I was indeed in denial.
I had to some how get my head together when being sober, to plan my escape from the demons. I said this can only be mind over matter, I can conquer this with no problem. When I said that to myself it was hard,
because I figured it might be a problem. I was affraid of the side affects that might go along with the cold turkey. I keep so busy with my mind and body that it was hard for the urge to kick in. I also ate dinner right after work instead of 10 or 11 at night after my drinking was done. Eating made me so full that I did not even want to drink the beer and blow me up even more. So I was full with some good food instead of alcohol.
Then when getting ready for work I would look in the mirror and what I saw was horrible. I was always skinny but I looked, as you would say, pregnant. I knew by giving up the alcohol that the stomach would go down quick, and it did. I had to say to myself that if I can only get the first day under my belt it will be a challenge to get to the second , third and so on. It was like a game to me, saying who will win? So as the days went by and the stomach going down it gave me more willpower to keep it up. I felt great about myself and what I saw was looking better and better as the days went on. I thought, man this positive attitude I started with is really working. Every day that went by it seems to have been easier and easier to cope this huge change in my life. You really have to want to stop the drinking, and no matter who tells you to quit it isn't going to work unless you really what to change your life on your own..I know because I was told a thousand times, but I was not ready for the change. As you know, the saying sometimes is, you just about have to hit rock bottom for the lights to turn on. They sure did for me and I so happy they did. I still have alcohol in the house and it will stay there, and I will still go to parties and functions and just have my coffee and water. I want to keep showing the demons that I am far better and smarter then they will ever be.
The demons can chase me all they want, but their not going to catch me nor get back into my body ever again. When I say, this is like a game, what I mean is, every one in the world whats to win always and never lose anything. So, when I said How I Did Self Hypnosis to Quit Drinking, it was some of the things I mentioned starting with a positive attitude that you can and will conquer the addiction that has taken over your body. Believe me to win that war with the demons and to start a new and Clean Life is more rewarding than you can ever know.
I am so thankful to God that I had no side affects at all, something that I was worried about the most, and why, I think that the positive attitude had a lot to do with it from the start. Your brain is a great thing and with a clear mind you can control whats happening inside. It stores habits, but you can erase those habits with your mind, just think positive and it will happen, it did for me.
My future... "DESTINY LIFE"
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Feeling Guilty With My Alcohol Addiction
I had a sense of real guilt all the years of drinking. I did not show it outside, but deep within I knew I was doing wrong, not only to myself but to my whole family. This past through my mind only when I was sober. Once the drinking started the quilt feeling left me and I did not care anymore.
My wife, and all of my family keep saying to slow it up, but I didn't listen nor did I even care. I thought to myself I am not doing anything wrong and I am not hurting anyone, so why slow up and even more quit all together. I saw that when I was sober everyone was around and people would talk to me more so when I drank. I was surely in denial but didn't want to admit I was wrong. I figured what's the problem, everyone drinks so why attack me for drinking? Well, after many years of drinking and the older I got it started to make sense to me. Everyone was on me for drinking because the cared about me and loved me, and wanted a good life for me.
I was always told by my wife and family, why is it that your job for 8 hours a day gets to see you sober and enjoy your humor , but I, we get to see you buzzed and miserable at night after the drinking starts. I said to myself what in the world are they talking about, I'm the same person in the morning as I am in the evening, so I thought. I was in denial so bad, that I thought everything was just great in my life. I was told on many occasions that my own children did not want to be around me when I drank. I never knew that, I just thought they were going out with friends, but the real truth was they were out with friends but to get away from me. Over the years of being told these things I finally realized this is a real mess I'm in here, that my family has to hide from me when I drank. So Sad!
I had a real alcohol addiction but could not see it, when it was right in front of my eyes. I was the type of person that could not just have one drink, I had to drink till it was gone. All said in the nut shell is that I felt guilty with my alcohol addition inside but just didn't want to do anything about it. In October 2009, I was confronted by my wife with a basic and so familiar statement. I new it was coming sooner or later, and it was, Give it up or I will have to do what I have to do, and she meant it this time for sure. I said to myself woo, this is for real this time and I'd better get my stuff together real quick.
On the following day, I announced that I was going cold turkey and get our lives back the way it should be.
I was so happy that day, when I said, this will be the end of the battle with my demons within, and felt great inside by doing it. Sometimes it takes someone to put you up against the wall with a decision that you have to make, and that decision could make or break everything in your life and your future. I made the right one and very happy and proud of it. I said to myself that night, is it really worth my wife, family, friends and my life for the almighty drink?
It has been now,almost 3 months sober and loving every minute of it. I am so happy that my wife called me on this and really not only saved our marriage but she saved my life. I was on the path of self destruction and never saw it. The thing I have learned is that everyone has deep within the will power to conquer and achieve anything in life if you just put your mind to it. Some, it may be harder than others but it can be done. I am so happy that all the side effects like the dt's never happened to me. God was by my side on that one and gave me the strength and will power to get through this. I can now focus with a clear mind of what our future is going to be and achieve my goals that I put on the back burner because of my alcohol addiction.
My wife, and all of my family keep saying to slow it up, but I didn't listen nor did I even care. I thought to myself I am not doing anything wrong and I am not hurting anyone, so why slow up and even more quit all together. I saw that when I was sober everyone was around and people would talk to me more so when I drank. I was surely in denial but didn't want to admit I was wrong. I figured what's the problem, everyone drinks so why attack me for drinking? Well, after many years of drinking and the older I got it started to make sense to me. Everyone was on me for drinking because the cared about me and loved me, and wanted a good life for me.
I had a real alcohol addiction but could not see it, when it was right in front of my eyes. I was the type of person that could not just have one drink, I had to drink till it was gone. All said in the nut shell is that I felt guilty with my alcohol addition inside but just didn't want to do anything about it. In October 2009, I was confronted by my wife with a basic and so familiar statement. I new it was coming sooner or later, and it was, Give it up or I will have to do what I have to do, and she meant it this time for sure. I said to myself woo, this is for real this time and I'd better get my stuff together real quick.
On the following day, I announced that I was going cold turkey and get our lives back the way it should be.
I was so happy that day, when I said, this will be the end of the battle with my demons within, and felt great inside by doing it. Sometimes it takes someone to put you up against the wall with a decision that you have to make, and that decision could make or break everything in your life and your future. I made the right one and very happy and proud of it. I said to myself that night, is it really worth my wife, family, friends and my life for the almighty drink?
It has been now,almost 3 months sober and loving every minute of it. I am so happy that my wife called me on this and really not only saved our marriage but she saved my life. I was on the path of self destruction and never saw it. The thing I have learned is that everyone has deep within the will power to conquer and achieve anything in life if you just put your mind to it. Some, it may be harder than others but it can be done. I am so happy that all the side effects like the dt's never happened to me. God was by my side on that one and gave me the strength and will power to get through this. I can now focus with a clear mind of what our future is going to be and achieve my goals that I put on the back burner because of my alcohol addiction.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
DREAMS CAN COME TRUE
All my life I aways had big dreams. To own a huge house over looking the water with a dock and a nice boat.Or, over looking the beautiful ocean and the smell of salt air and the warm breeze blowing through my hair.
My parents always told me I had rich taste. I guess I got that from my mothers side of the family, because her relatives owned a castle in England, with servants and maids. That is were I get the rich taste, I guess.
So, my story is that in the last almost 3 months I have been sober, and with the sobriety I can now think straight and have my head together to try and live these big dreams that I could not get before sobriety. I am on a path to achieve these high goals I have. First, by going to school to get my realtor licience , and sell some great properties in the shore area and get those big commissions too. Not a over night job, but it is possible in the near future. My father and uncle sold home and did very well. I know the business of homes only because I have built a few of them with my father in-law from start to finish, including concrete, framing and everything that goes with house building. So, I have that part conquered and I know what to look for in finding a great home for a buyer.
Second, is to retire from the job I have now, which is a Manager for a large Cemetery and Crematory in New Jersey. I have been working in that field for about 24 years and before that I worked at a hospital for 10 years..In my opinion that is about enough of that kind of work for me. I have seen it all and have done it all, and don't want to see it or do it anymore. It's time for my big dream to come true! People say how in the world can you do that kind of work. I tell them first, you have to be caring and kind to the people you serve because they come into the office grieving of their loss and it is my job to try the best I can to comfort them. I must say I am great at that and I will be great in the selling of homes. I have a lot of confidence in myself now being sober and also a clear mind to get those big dreams and make them a reality.
Mark
My parents always told me I had rich taste. I guess I got that from my mothers side of the family, because her relatives owned a castle in England, with servants and maids. That is were I get the rich taste, I guess.
So, my story is that in the last almost 3 months I have been sober, and with the sobriety I can now think straight and have my head together to try and live these big dreams that I could not get before sobriety. I am on a path to achieve these high goals I have. First, by going to school to get my realtor licience , and sell some great properties in the shore area and get those big commissions too. Not a over night job, but it is possible in the near future. My father and uncle sold home and did very well. I know the business of homes only because I have built a few of them with my father in-law from start to finish, including concrete, framing and everything that goes with house building. So, I have that part conquered and I know what to look for in finding a great home for a buyer.
Mark
Saturday, January 9, 2010
FROM START TO FINISH
Mark
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